picking myselft back up...

after falling flat on my face this weekend with my eating. :( i eat out to much this last weekend and when i stepped on the scale this morning i wanted to scream. so i am not looking forward to my ww weigh in tonight, but it is what it is and i just have to live with it and get back on track. i would have thought with all the walking that i did this weekend it would have off set the eating but i guess not.


points~
3~oatmeal
4~chicken cabbage salad
1~ 60 cal pudding
1/2~half a pita pocket

relay time!!!

Celebrate Remember Fight Back

Yes it it Relay time. I hope to see you at this years event. Event starts at 6pm and is held at the Umatilla County Fair Grounds in Hermiston. A great family event for one and all with games for the kids, a huge silent auction (5-8pm) and great food. All monies raised go to help fighting cancer. To date we have raised over $70,ooo for this years event with more money to come in at the event. Hope you will come and support the American Cancer Society's Relay For Life of Hermiston Giving A Night For The Fight.

thursday

okay so i ate a candy bar last night and waisted 7 points what's up with that. i see the same thing happening again where i am slipping and getting back into old (bad) habits. so i am sticking to my guns today and i have the whole day planned out, and i will not slip up. so here is my food for the day:

3~oatmeal
4~chicken cabbage salad
1/2~half of pita
1~60 cal pudding
2~bagel and cream cheese
4~turkey pita sandwich
0~chips
2~100 cal chocolate bar
1~fresh cherry's
1~ww fudge bar

and i still have 5 points to play with. so check in tomorrow to see if i really did it.



EDIT!!



i am sitting here at work with nothing to do and all i want to do is EAT!! what the hell! i am a board um eater there i said it yes i love to eat when i am board and have nothing else to do. i can eat non stop as long as i have food in front of me. so why am i a board um eater? what's wrong with me that i think i am hungry when really i just need something to do? and all i want right now is this.i want to be like Homer and not care about what i look like but the real true is that i do care about what i look like the older i get the more i want to be thin and healthy and look good for me and for my husband. it just so hard at times when you really want to be good but you end up not being so good. the habits are so hard to break and i see them coming back again and it scares me. i dont' want to go another 14 or 16 weeks loosing and gaining the same 5 pounds. i just want to loose but if i end up having a gain now and then that's okay but not every week. because then i feel as if i am failing me and my friends that look at me and say wow if she can do it then i can do it. so now that i have ranted a little about wanting to eat i have been able to kill time and now i can go home. and so far i have been able to keep to my points:)

it's a hump day baby!!

why is it when you have the best intentions something goes wrong and then you feel bad. today my boss got us starbucks and i had no intentions on having it today i was just going to eat all points so i would not go over today but here i am drinking 3 points worth of starbucks. but it's all good right? i am going to water aerobics tonight so i will work off the 3 points.

i feel like i have slacked off the last couple of days though. last night waiting for dinner to get done cooking i was so hungry so what do i do but start eating. i just couldn't keep myself busy and out of the kitchen to quite eating everything in sight. so why did i eat? because it only made me feel guilty that i ate all that crap before i ate my dinner. it's so frustrating when i do that it's a mindless eating that you think you can control until it's to late and you have eaten way more then you should have and then your mad at yourself for not having any self control. so the rest of today's goal is to have self control and to watch what remaing points i have left for the day.


points~
3~oatmeal
2~bagel and butter
4~chicken cabbage salad
1/2~half a pita
3~starbucks
2~bagel and cream cheese
1~half a pita with butter and garlic
1~green salad with dressing
6~spaghetti
1~ww fudge pop
7~candy bar (not happy about that)

24 flex points left

i'm back :)

i am back from my long (but way to short) weekend at the coast and a crazzzzyyyyy monday at work, then ww and water aerobics. my ww meeting was great i lost 2.4 pounds yes i said 2.4 pounds and i even ate my claim chowder while i as a the coast. i had a great time visiting with my family while i was there and most of them have not seen me for awhile so they where all so proud of me and what i have been able to accomplish with my weight loss. i am still on cloud nine about my weigh in last night. with this loss it keeps me motivated to keep loosing and that i will be able to get to my little goal weight:) i just have to keep fighting each and everyday to that loss, some days will be better then others. keeping track of my points and i think with doing water aerobics it is all working together.

points~
3~oatmeal
4~starbucks
4~chicken cabbage salad
1~whole wheat pita bread
1~60 cal pudding
2~bagel and cream cheese
0~fresh cherry's
2~ww snack
3~cookies :(
7~broccoli chicken bake

31 extra points left

one day closer to friday!!!

i am so over whelmed with the craziness right now! i am leaving tomorrow afternoon for lincoln city, oregon (the great oregon coast). i am sitting here at work wishing i was at home getting everything done before i need to leave. the house needs to be cleaned (not sure why the dogs and dh will only have it in a mess by the time i get back), i have my last relay for life meeting tonight (next week is our event), i still need to pack almost everything (i am not sure what the weather will be like) my bff's want me to go to the pool tonight for another great water aerobics workout (not going to happen which makes me sad), have to drop off the bagels order that came in today to my mother in-law and i need to eat some dinner. so do you think i will get it all done? i know i will but i will be dead tyred by the time my head hits the pillow tonight. even though it's crazy i don't feel like pigging out right now, which makes me really happy. it's so great to see myself changing into this new person who looks at food totaly in a differt way. my first question is how many points?? i am spelring this weekend we are going to our favoirte seafood restaurant while we are there and i am having claim chower, and then i am having a small peice of dark chocolate seafom



points~

3~oatmeal
2~english muffin with jelly
4~chicken cabbage salad
1~60 cal pudding
2~bagel (blueberry) and cream cheese
2~ww snack

a quote for the day...

"You have to find something that you love enough to be able to take risks, jump over the hurdles and break through the brick walls that are always going to be placed in front of you."

George Lucas (1944 - ) Creator of the epic "Star Wars" series

this was emailed to me at work today and i thought that it is so true with my (our) battle with weight loss. we will always have hurdles that we have to deal with and how we deal with them depends on how we look at food. my hurdle is chocolate i love the stuff and i know if i start eating it sometimes i just can't stop, so i try not to keep it around me but i do have a little now and then to treat myself and to keep my over eating under control. i have found out that i love myself enough to make the commitment to change that i am worth this battle of the fat and i know that i will not be the skinny girl in the bikini on the beach but that's ok i will be healthier and skinner then i was 2 years ago and for me that is worth this battle.

points~

2~english muffin with butter

4~starbucks

4~chicken cabbage salad

1~60 cal pudding

2~bagel and cream cheese

6~chicken thighs

2~corn on the cob

1~veggies and dip

2~ww snack

0~hot chocolate w/ sf vanilla flavoring

4~banana and peanut butter

is it tuesday??

i am still so happy from my weigh in last night. i am staying focused and on track today (so far) and i am looking forward to water aerobics again tonight (it's another HOT day outside). i am in love with this salmon dinner that i got at costco, it's a pre-made dinner of salmon, onion and bell pepper kabob's. corey bbq'd it up for me last night before i got home from my ww meeting and it was so good. i wanted to eat more before i left for water aerobics. i did have a little more when i got home and then i had some today for lunch and i still have some for dinner tonight. i should have taken a picture of it before i ate it, next time.

points~
3~oatmeal
2~english muffin with jelly
5~salmon
0~onion and bell pepper
1~60 cal pudding
1~100 cal popcorn
10~salmon
0~onion and bell peppers
0~hot chocolate

if you are a ww person check this out!!

weekend recap

i think i did okay not the best but i am okay with what and how i ate for the weekend. the bbq was a blast we had lots of good food and good conversations. i was proud of myself that i did not over eat and as soon as i was done i walked away from the table (so i would not want more). i made a ww pear crisp that went over really well everyone loved it and it was good for every one's waist lines.

today~
3~oatmeal
4~bbq chicken green salad
1~onion bagel
7~salmon
0~onion and bell pepper
3~ice cream with a cookie

okay so went and weighed into night at my ww meeting and i LOST 1.6 pounds for a total of 65.6 (again) but i am so happy happy that i had a loss tonight. i have been really good this last week and i think that posting my points my be the thing for me to keep doing and blogging. this was my first whole week doing both and i am so happy and enjoying my weight loss journey. i wasn't going to water aerobics tonight but both my bff's wanted to go so i went and i am so glad that i went i feel great and i got some great exercise and i am so relaxed. thanks girls you made my night after my bad monday at work.

this is my new water bottle/cup. the cup is plastic with a plastic straw and i am drinking so much more water out of it then out of glass today i have drank 7 glasses.

let's party it's friday!!!

i am so so happy it's friday :) i am truly looking forward to the weekend. i get to do a little traveling to hood river, oregon with my in-laws to drop off a car to my sister in-law and then our big bbq on sunday. my work day is more then half over and i am getting together with a very cool chic tonight. i hope you are have a great friday as well.

points~
3~oatmeal
4~starbucks (my friday treat)
4~chicken cabbage salad
2~bagel and laughing cow cheese
1~ww bar
0~chips (only 35cals, 0 fat, 1 fiber)
7~subway

attitude is everything!!

wow it is so true that your attitude is everything. if you think you are a loser for not loosing weight you won't loose, but if you think positively you will loose. i am in such good spirits today!!! i am back on track and sticking to the program and feel great, and the most important thing is that i know i can do this. i have been weighing each morning at home and i keep loosing a little at a time. so for all you out there put smile on your face and say i can do this and keep a positive attitude no more negativity. if you eat something that makes you feel guilty tell your self it's only this once and move on you didn't fall off the wagon you just hit a small bump in the road. my bump in the road maybe the great smelling donuts that one of my clients brought into the office today. i have been smelling them every time i walk to the back of my office i am so wanting one, but i have stayed away even though the temptation this there.

the topic at my ww meeting this week was rewards. it got me thinking how do i reward myself for my weight loss to date and the weight that i still need to loose. most of my rewards have been shopping for new clothing since all my other close no long fit (always a good thing to go shopping for a smaller size). but i am not sure what i really want to work for as my reward when i hit my goal weight. so i want to know what have or will be your reward(s) for your weight loss journey?

points~

3 ~ oatmeal
2 ~ english muffin with jelly
3 ~ ww chili
2 ~ bagel and laughing cow cheese
1 ~ 100 cal popcorn
6 ~ donut ( and it didn't even taste that great)
7 ~ ww dinner at applebee's (grilled garlic herb chicken with veggies, yummy!!)
2 ~ ww desert chocolate raspberry cake (shared with my mother in-law)

edit ~ i ate a donut!! so i gave in and ate a plain donut no glaze, no chocolate, no nuts or sprinkles just a plain donut.

over by 3 points today (it's okay) i still have 29 flex points left

did you know

Today, June 11th, is National German Chocolate Cake Day. Your best bet may be to celebrate by scrubbing yourself with a chocolate-scented body polish like this one, as opposed to chewing on some actual German Chocolate Cake. Just my opinion...

hump day!!

so i am happy that today is wednesday it's on day closer to my weekend and to our big fathers day bbq. but i am alittle worried as far as eating that day (the day before my weigh in). but i am planning things that i can eat and not feel guilty having extra of. we are having a bbq chicken thighs, deep fried corn (i will have mine steamed or cooked on the bbq) green salad, baked beans, an asian salad, veggies and dip, and not sure what else will make it way to the table. but i know i can handle the challenge that this will bring. i will not over eat and i will enjoy myself.

i feel great about yesterday and that i keep within my points in fact i still had 3 left over that i did not use because i was so full from dinner. i did not over eat that big for me right now because for some reason i have been over eating and hating myself afterwords. oh and i drank 10 servings of water yesterday, i have been struggling with my water intake but since i got my new cup/bottle i have been doing great. it still amazes me that i will drink more water with a straw then out of a bottle, i am already on my 4th serving and it's not even lunch time yet. i am on track today and it feels great.

3 ~ oatmeal
2 ~ english muffin with jelly
3 ~ ww chili
2 ~ bagel and cream cheese
2 ~ grapes
1 ~ ww cookie
13 ~ steak salad with light ranch dressing (big in points but tasted so so good)

32 flex points left.

it's a tuesday

so my weigh in last night did not go the way i wanted it i gained .2 this time. so today i am committed 100% to keep on track and keep within my points and i will take one day at a time and do my very best each day. no more negativity on the gains positive out look to keep me on track. i know i can do this just stay focused on the big (smaller) picture that you will look great.

points~

3 ~ oatmeal
4 ~ chicken cabbage salad
2 ~ bagel and cream cheese
0 ~ hot chocolate and sf vanilla flavoring
2 ~ ww snack pack
4 ~ ww chili
3 ~ corn chips
2 ~ grapes



this made me happy when i got home and found this in my mail box. i love when i get my new ww magazine in the mail. i read it cover to cover word for word.

i have to say that i am really happy today with what i have eaten and that i have keep to my point limit and right now i still have 3 points left at 8:30 pm that's good right now for me.

till tomorrow!!

points what points?

so i did not do so well this weekend at keeping track of my points. saturday was a free for all at my bff's house while scrapbooking, and sunday was not to bad but i did have 3 diet root beers and only 2 glasses of water. so i am back on the ban wagon of being good again, i think i do this every monday :)

okay so my points for today!

3 ~ oatmeal
4 ~ starbucks (i think i said i needed to stay away for a while)
4 ~ chicken cabbage salad
1 ~ 60 cal pudding snack
2 ~ 100 cal snack pack
2 ~ 100 snack pack
2 ~ ww snack pack
53 ~ burger, fries, milk shake (a very bad girl)


wish me luck i have weigh in here a about an hour and i am scared that i will have another gain. i just really heat food (ya right) now. i will post the good or the bad later tonight.

it's friday :)

2 ~ english muffin with butter
4 ~ starbucks
6 ~ subway
1 ~ ww cookie
2 ~ pringle stixs
? ~ went out for dinner at El Palma (mexican)

so my weigh in last night was not so good another week and i gained again .8 so i am at a total loss of 64.2 pounds. i have gained back 6.2pounds in 12 weeks what's up with that. i am just so stressed about this now what happened to enjoying loosing the weight? now it's a battle and i am starting to hate it. someone told me yesterday that i need to cut my carbs out for a few days and that will help drop some weight fast, but what will happen when i start eating my carbs again? why does this have to be so damn hard? i know nothing in life is easy, but this should be i should be at my goal weight by now instead of struggling to get there. the bad thing is that i don't hate my weight i like where i am at but in order to have a life time membership with ww (to not pay anymore) i need to loose more weight i need to be at least 146 pounds can i really make that weight goal? i really think not and i am not sure i want to be that thin i think i would really be happy in the 150's that would get me a couple of sizes smaller and a little lighter. so i am going to talk with my dr. and see what he says about where i should truly be, and i hope he will take me off one of my meds or cut the amount i have to take per day. ok so enough of this.

my point is

4 ~ cereal w/ milk
4 ~ starbucks ( i think i need to cut these out for a few weeks)
7 ~ taco salad
? ~ nilla cakesters (bad girl but they are so good)
2 ~ 100 cal kudo's bar
0 ~ celery stick and pea pods

points

3 ~ oatmeal
3 ~ starbucks (mocha peppermint frap light)
? ~ small muffin
0 ~ green beans
1 ~ mashed potato
4 ~ pork steak
2 ~ 100 cal snack pack
2 ~ ww cookies
3 ~ chips and home made salsa
7 ~ 4 small taco's
2 ~ ww ice cream

not sure what will be for dinner at this time i am thinking either taco salad or taco's with ground turkey.

tuesday's points

3 ~ oatmeal (cinnamon roll)
3 ~ starbucks (carmel frap light)
4 ~ chicken cabbage salad (all my idea)
2 ~ 90 cal snack pack (chocolate mint rice cakes)
1 ~ 100 cal popcorn snack (kettle corn)
0 ~ dt. pepsi
2 ~ ww snack pack
6 ~ pork steak
1 ~ green beans
3 ~ mashed potateo's
1 ~ ww fudge pop

i feel good today even though I did not stay within my points today but i am okay with that. i went and worked out at curves tonight and got a 30 min workout in, that really makes me feel good.

the weekend update.

so my weekend went well except for my eating. man i am so mad at myself for eating like a cow and eating all the wrong things. so what's wrong with me, why do i want to eat everything in sight even when i am full. i eat and eat and i know i am full i can feel it but i can not walk away or push the plate away from me. why is it in my head that i can do this and still try to loos weight, when i really know the truth and that is i will gain every time. i think for the next couple of weeks i am going to track my points on my blog here for everyone to see and hope that i will want to watch what i eat because you all then can judge me about what i am eating. sorry for the ramble, hope you had a good monday.